I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
Randomize
