Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
You ate ashes out of my bong
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