In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
