One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Randomize