all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
