I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
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