Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
Randomize
