You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Randomize
