We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
Randomize
