I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
Randomize
