i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
