I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize