the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
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