no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
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