The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
Randomize
