Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
Randomize
