If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
Randomize