Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
