How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
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