I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
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Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
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the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
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