You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
Randomize
