Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
Randomize