I think i peed on brittanys purse
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
it's like iHOP with fire
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
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