She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
I just got carded by a ten year old.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
Is her dick bigger than yours?
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
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