No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
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