Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
My apartment stinks of burning failure
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
