how hairy? two words: wookie tits
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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