i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
Randomize
