Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
Randomize
