is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
Randomize
