We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
someone took a shit in my car last night and left $5 on the seat...
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
I was so drunk I accidentally put in two tampons.
I tried to talk you out of it. You were worried about alcohol being a blood thinner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
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