Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
Randomize
