whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
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