I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
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