Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Also—I just realized that your wedding gift is still on my dining room table. So...as awful as I am for not yet sending it (and I still need your address), at least I didn’t bring my screaming children to potentially the most important day of your life?
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