i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
Every concussion has its silver lining
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
