New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
Randomize