This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
