Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
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