Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Randomize
