I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Randomize