he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
Too much gin, very little bucket
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
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