Michael Bay diarrhea
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
Randomize