Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
Tell her she can't have a vagina
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
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