Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Randomize
