They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Randomize
