my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
