Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
I will find, mount, and marry that person.