its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
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I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
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Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
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