so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
Did you just see the Batmobile???
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
Randomize
