I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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